Dear Journal,
Last night has got to be one of the most confusing, freakishly weird nights of my life. And that's saying a lot. Yesterday started out normally, although I'm usually able to avoid Snyder. However, that night, things started to go wrong.
That vision I had while doing that spell with Anya was my first hint at the things to come. I didn't pay too much attention to it at the time, it wasn't that much out of the ordinary. Who knows how many times my magic has backfired. I started to get nervous when I went to the library. Buffy, Xander and Giles were there, looking very upset. Something had happened, and I was really worried for a couple of minutes. Sunnydale has never been the safest of places, and they looked as if a close friend had died. It turned out that *I* was that close friend that was dead.
You should have seen Xander and Buffy when I realized I was still alive. I'd swear they were trying to suffocate me, they were hugging me so hard. And Giles, who usually is much more steady and calm, was just as bad. At least he looked embarrassed afterwards.
While we were trying to figure what was happening, Angel ran in to tell us I was dead. The look on his face when he saw me was priceless. The whole conversation seemed like something out of the moives, or something you'd see on TV. They left to save the Bronze from the vampires who had taken it captive, and the *she* came.
It was so strange. All of a sudden I was attacked by *myself*, a vampire me. She didn't seem exactly sane. She sort of reminded me of Drusilla. Do all female vampires loose their minds? I also think she was gay. She kept on doing these things that were very disturbing. Other than that whole blood sucking thing, I mean. That's creepy too, but all vamps do it. I was referring to the way she kept on touching me and other girls and licking our necks.
And her clothes! They were so tight and revealing. I suppose the leather did attract a lot of attention, which was what she was aiming for. I wonder what people would say if I changed my look? I don't think I really want to know. I couldn't breathe in that outfit. I suppose that's not really an issue for her, being a vampire and not breathing and all.
That other Willow and I are so different. I wonder why? I guess it's because she's now a demon. I didn't even fool Anya and the vampires for 5 minutes. How can she and I be so different? We're the same person.
She almost killed me, after the fighting started, (How did she get out of the cage, anyways?) but I couldn't let Buffy kill her. Buffy agreed and pulled the stake away at the last possible second. Goddess, she has fast reflexes. I know my double is a demon and everything. She would have killed me in the blink of an eye. But she could have been me. If one of the thousands of vampires that have attacked me succeeded in changing me, I would be her. I would be that insane, bloodsucking demon. I couldn't let her be killed.